Women will sometimes tell you they don’t care how tall you are, how much money you make, whether you have hair, or what your body looks like.
And while none of these things individually determines whether somebody will be attracted to you, the truth is that people notice a lot more than they admit. The good news is that many of the things that make you more attractive are completely within your control.
The bigger message is that attraction isn’t about being genetically perfect, ridiculously wealthy, six-foot-four, or looking like a male model. Some things you simply cannot change, and there’s no reason to obsess about them. Focus your energy on the things you can control. Becoming more attractive isn’t about pretending to be somebody else. It’s about taking responsibility for yourself and consistently showing up as the strongest, healthiest, most confident version of you.
What Women Notice
1. Your Height – You can’t control how tall you are, but you absolutely can control how you present yourself. Your physique, proportions, posture, clothing, and overall presentation can dramatically influence how your height is perceived. Wearing big, boxy, oversized clothing can make you appear shorter, while dressing properly and staying fit can make you look taller and more proportionate.
2. How Much Money You Make – You don’t need to be rich. What’s attractive isn’t necessarily the size of your bank account—it’s what financial responsibility can represent. Drive, ambition, motivation, goals, discipline, and having a plan for your future are incredibly attractive qualities. Live below your means, save and invest, have goals, and demonstrate that you’re actually going somewhere in life.
3. Your Hair – Yes, women notice your hair, but what matters even more is how you handle what you’ve got. If you have great hair, take care of it, style it, and get it cut regularly. If you’re losing your hair, own it and make intentional grooming choices. Having hair isn’t everything; taking care of yourself is.
4. Your Body and Physique – You don’t need six-pack abs, but being physically fit absolutely makes a difference. Broad shoulders, muscular arms, and a healthy waist are attractive, but fitness also communicates something deeper. It tells people that you’re disciplined, responsible, and respect yourself enough to take care of your body. As an added bonus, your clothes are going to look better too.
5. Your Clothing – You don’t need to be ridiculously stylish or fashion-forward, but you should look like you give a damn. A well-dressed, well-groomed man who understands how his clothing should fit is attractive. Style and grooming are two areas where you have tremendous control over how other people perceive you.
6. Your Sexual Performance – Physical intimacy matters in a relationship. You don’t need to be some kind of sexual superhero, but confidence, communication, attraction, and being attentive to your partner are important. If you’re experiencing sexual-performance issues, don’t ignore them or allow embarrassment to prevent you from addressing the problem.
7. Your Confidence – “Just be yourself” doesn’t mean showing up as the worst version of yourself. Stand tall. Make eye contact. Smile. Communicate. Engage with people. Carry yourself with poise, dignity, and self-respect. Confidence isn’t about being arrogant—it’s about presenting the strongest, healthiest version of who you already are.
8. Your Teeth – You don’t need giant, blinding-white veneers or a perfectly straight Hollywood smile. You do, however, need to take care of your teeth. Brush them, keep them clean, go to the dentist, and address issues if they bother you. Your smile is one of the first things people notice, and basic dental hygiene matters.
9. Your Social Status – I’m not talking about being famous or having thousands of followers. I’m talking about whether people respect you and whether you can comfortably interact with others. Can you walk into a room, communicate, network, and engage?
10. Your Friend Circle – Friends matter too because the people you surround yourself with say something about who you are. If your friends are classy, respectable, ambitious guys, some of that positive perception reflects back on you.
11. Your Hygiene – This one is non-negotiable. Groom yourself. Take care of your hair, skin, nose hairs, ears, breath, body odor, and everything else.
12. How You Smell – Smelling great can instantly make you more attractive, while smelling dirty—or drowning yourself in fragrance—can instantly destroy attraction.
