Marni is with us today, discussing sex as a female relationship expert. What works for one person may or may not work for another person. Communication is vital with anything, as different people have different likes and dislikes.
Dazzle the pants off of your spicy senorita
The man going down on a girl is important. If you want her to go down on you, you need to go down on her. Many guys take cues from porn, but these movies are not designed for women. Porn doesn’t show how a woman wants to be talked to, treated, touched, or anything like that. Two seconds of foreplay are shown, and then boom, a woman is getting it from behind. That is not how a woman wants to have sex.
Women need more time. They need triple the amount of time from men to get excited and aroused. A dude takes seconds, but a woman takes much longer. Start foreplay before getting into the bedroom. It starts as soon as you start interacting with each other. An entire date can be part of the foreplay process. Teasing, flirting, and touching lead to the grand finale. Remember that not all women like dirty talk, but most like to be complimented.
Make comments to have her feel more empowered, confident, and comfortable, which is better for sex. She needs to get into her body and feel what is happening, so calm her mind and make her more comfortable to get her out of her head. The more that she’s experiencing that feeling rather than insecure feelings, the more sexual and playful she will be with you.
Men are not verbal enough about what is important regarding sex. If a man is on the receiving end of sex, he needs to give reinforcement that it feels good and that she’s better than anybody else. Build her confidence so she will want to go back down there and do even better next time.
A lot of women don’t reach climax from penetration. They have to be stimulated in other ways. Many guys get down on themselves if they don’t get a woman to complete, but it’s not happening for many women. Ask her how you can get her to ultimate pleasure but don’t add expectation and pressure. Instead of asking if she climaxed, ask her what gets her off and what would help her.
A problem many men have is that they assume they need to be hammering away for 27 minutes to get a woman to climax. The truth is that this is typically not pleasurable for a woman. This is where communication with your partner is essential. You can communicate afterward what was liked, as the feedback will make her want to continue.
Toys are wonderful and are about being intimate with each other. You should be able to talk about your fantasies that you want to try. Don’t just present a toy. Instead, go shopping online or go to a store together. Take baby steps so it’s not overwhelming. Ask questions like, “Do you want to try that? Let’s try that together.”
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