I needed a better reality, but the only thing I could truly change right then was me. So I did. I was expecting the process to be dramatic and sudden, but for the most part it isnβt. I took it slow and deliberate.
For me, the time for reinvention hit when I was 30 years old. I decided it was time for a change because, until then, I was a fitness guy, bodybuilder, personal trainer, and gym owner. Being the fitness guy was the only thing I considered myself to be.
The other reality is that other people viewed me as that fitness guy. But at 30, I decided the time was now for something different. I wanted to be an image consultant, which was the beginning of my new life. Regarding other people who didn’t accept or understand my efforts, such as who I wanted to become or where I wanted to go, I ignored them. I went for it.
I had a reinvention plan, a comprehensive process that involved developing new skills and changing who I knew myself to be. Keep in mind that you’re never too old for change. Many guys say they’re too old at 30 or even 27. A lot of guys think they’re too old at 40 or 50. But as long as you’re alive, you’re NOT too old to reinvent. You can change and be the man that you want to become.
Are you prepared to lead yourself to your reinvention and dreams? Either change or don’t, but it’s all on you. If you’re ready for reinvention, start with a self-assessment. Be honest about who you are and where you are in life. Find out what you’re unhappy with and what about your life you’d like to change.
After you’ve assessed yourself and where you are, look at your strengths. What are you great at? What do you love? What are you passionate about? And what have other people told you that you’re good at doing? Determine your non-negotiables related to your core values. These core values will keep you on course.
Now that you’ve completed your self-assessment and evaluated your strengths, visualize the person you want to become. This step can be challenging because we often feel like we are what we are or what we’ve been. Reinventing myself was hard for me at 30 years old because, from age 12, I always viewed myself as the fitness guy, But I was determined to shift to the style guy.
With that, I needed to own my self-perception and understand that many people wouldn’t initially get it. Sure, they eventually will, but at first, they’ll view you as the person they perceived you to be up to that point. Be consistent with your actions; eventually, perceptions and opinions will shift.
Seeing your progress through measurable goals is vital. What are the small steps that get you to your North Star? What are the steps to measure getting to your goal and success? For me, quantifiable success was developing a website, filing legal paperwork with the local/state/federal government, obtaining my first client, etc. Establish measurable goals to move you through the process and perpetuate you in the right direction.
During this time, take better care of yourself. Self-care is a critical component of the reinvention process. Be the best version of yourself. For me, that meant being in physically good shape, so I stopped drinking. I had to calm the voices in my head that were telling me I wasn’t good enough and that the life that I was living was disappointing.
When I stopped drinking, a lot of things fell into place. I stopped hanging out with the people holding me back, which is another component of reinventing yourself. Outgrow those people to become the man you want to be. When I stopped drinking and hanging out with people who were holding me back, I wasn’t making bad decisions and doing self-destructive things. Every aspect of my life got better.
During this time, I was building positive habits that would impact the rest of my life. For me, it was getting up early, working out daily, being focused and disciplined in my work, and not getting distracted by the noise. Let go of the destructive behaviors you’ve had in the past and commit to change. Learn and develop new habits to become the person you want to be.
Developing new skills is part of the self-exploration process. Identify gaps and weaknesses where you are deficient and abilities you would like to develop to become the person you envision. I engrossed myself in expanding my knowledge about style and grooming. I was great at fitness, nutrition, and diet, but I needed to learn more about fashion.
I learned about tying Windsor knots and how a suit should fit. I also educated myself by reading books and visiting tailors. The process continued when I started to film myself discussing these topics. Early in my reinvention process, I looked like a hot mess. I needed a new wardrobe to fit the part. While developing these new skills, you can learn on the fly, regurgitate until you make it right, and execute repeatedly. Build your knowledge base in your new concept and protocol.
Dressing better as the man you want to become where the role you wish to have is essential. You can’t wear sloppy clothing and be a hot mess regarding grooming. Adopt a better style and have an incredible grooming routine to present a great package consistent with how you want to be perceived.
Most of the work is already done now, and you don’t need to open your mouth. People will automatically assume that you are what you perceive yourself to be, which is the beautiful thing about style and grooming. It’s the great equalizer. You may not have the most extensive knowledge base and may not technically be an ‘expert.’ Still, you will look better than others and automatically be perceived as better. But you must back it up.
Looking the part is one thing, but it’s another to talk a good game. Execution is a critical component that many people miss. They envision themselves as something or someone but fail because they need to execute. Adopt a growth mindset and embrace personal development. When you do this, you can shut out the noise and past failures.
Stop judging yourself by yesterday’s past and what others perceive you to be. Focus on executing the plan with a strategy. Build yourself into the man you envision yourself to be. That is where the magic happens and when you become a better man.